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Twit Happens

  • Jordin Sparks

    Jordin Sparks

    I have very little time to pack...holy smokes. *begins pep talk* Okay, Jordin, you can do this!!!!

  • Nicole Polizzi

    Nicole Polizzi

    #TEAMKOURTNEY 🙋🏽💕 mamas stick together and she's one hell of a mom!

  • Tyra Banks

    Tyra Banks

    I am looking at a woman with unshaven armpits and am so fascinated. I really wish us chicks didn't feel forced to shave. #liberation

  • Rosie


    why does r family beach trip always coincide with SHARK WEEK ?

  • Joel McHale

    Joel McHale

    From now on please use this standardized retweet-for-your-birthday-tweet-request: "happy birthday". Thanks

  • The Real Paula Abdul

    The Real Paula Abdul

    @SimonCowell I was deeply saddened to hear of your mother's passing. She was such a dear, sweet lady. My heart is with you & your family.

  • John Krasinski

    John Krasinski

    I will admit... I did a straight up Arsenio fist pump for the amazing ladies of #USAWomensSoccer So awesome!!!!

  • olivia wilde

    olivia wilde

    To our co-flyers on the flight to NYC last night, hope the screaming baby soundtrack didn't destroy your love for children everywhere. 😁👶🏼😬

  • Billy Bush

    Billy Bush

    I always fall for it: “coverage begins at…” is NOT same as “game begins at…” #fifareliefa #USWNT 💤⚽️

  • Larry King

    Larry King

    I was wondering, how do the British celebrate July 4th? Well I guess they don’t celebrate it, but how do they teach it? Just wondering...

  • Drew Carey

    Drew Carey

    We really declared independence on July 2nd. Just saying. 😁

  • Tom Arnold

    Tom Arnold

    Women cleaning my room here at the Moscow Ritz look like super models. I'm getting out of here before they see what I did to the bathroom.

  • samantha ronson

    samantha ronson

    if a man is "crying" on the 911 call i'm gonna assume he did it. #dateline

  • Brad Paisley

    Brad Paisley

    I'm comforted by the thought that on this day in history...the founding fathers were arguing.

  • Cara Delevingne

    Cara Delevingne

    No one can be angry at a foot rub

  • dax shepard

    dax shepard

    I try to stay sleeveless for the whole summer, but needed to ramp up for the holiday. I'm now shirtless in overalls. For my country.

  • Conan O'Brien

    Conan O'Brien

    I'm writing an Irish-Catholic version of "Inside Out," where the only 2 characters are Guilt and Jameson's.

  • Bethenny Frankel

    Bethenny Frankel

    My friend wants boob lift so i walked in her house & said "lemme see ur boobs." Her response "ummm we're on speaker w my client." 😝

  • Ryan Reynolds

    Ryan Reynolds

    When Bruce Banner's angry, he turns into the Hulk. It'd be cool to see the Hulk get angry, then turn into Nancy Grace.

  • Seth MacFarlane

    Seth MacFarlane

    The scented candle aisle at your local department store is a great place to meet really nice people who fart a lot.

  • Cher


    Jumped in pool (w/ALL My Clothes on😂) Cause Kids Dared me 2 They are 11...How old am I now😭 AFTER I JUMPED IN ALL THE GROWN UPS JUMPED IN👻‼️

  • #EvanRachelWould


    Pool hopping in the usa. ✊🏊🇺🇸

  • Cher


    Haven't eaten so much in LAST 17 YEARS😱‼️BREAKFAST CREPES W/NUTTELLA,Lunch, FRENCH FRIES &🎂, Waiting 4 ⛵️,🍦,Now Dinner😱 JUST ROLL ME HOME😂😭

  • Jennifer Lopez

    Jennifer Lopez

    Happy Friday Lovers! 😘

  • Ellen DeGeneres

    Ellen DeGeneres

    Why is @Meghan_Trainor great at playing shortstop? She’s all about that base. #ClassicJokeFriday

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