True Tori Recap: Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott Battle in Therapy & at Home
“True Tori” aired its third episode on Tuesday, with Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott battling each other during emotional therapy sessions and fights at home. Kicking off just days after McDermott returned home from rehab, Spelling appreciated his renewed household help, but worried that they would just slip back into their old routines without working through their issues.
At an “intensive therapy” counseling session, Spelling initially struggled to confronted McDermott about his infidelity, before it all started pouring out. He said of cheating partner Emily Goodhand, “I wasn’t attracted to her. It was just like a warm body. I felt like I was on auto-pilot.” McDermott went on to lament that after having so many kids, his sex life with Spelling had “ebbs and flows,” and admitted, “Do I always want more with you? Absolutely. I’m insatiable. Every day and all day.”
Spelling said her husband’s perspective was “unfair,” and questioned whether that was what really drove him to cheat, pointing out, “Like the weekend before, we had sex all weekend.” McDermott responded, “Sex was an escape, just like drugs and alcohol.”
Spelling was again offended when McDermott was unsure whether his greatest nightmare and biggest mistake was cheating on her or getting caught and having it all come out so publicly. McDermott, however, called Spelling the closest thing to a “perfect person,” and labeled himself an “evil” “psychopath.”
But the actress told their therapist, “He was just never happy. Our sex life was never enough,” with McDermott retorting, “We would have sex every two weeks. Three. Once we even pushed it to a month once.”
Spelling went on, “I thought he was really happy with me…. At the end of the day, it still makes me feel really bad about myself… I wasn’t good enough.” As the actress broke down and sobbed over the insecurities McDermott’s behavior brought out in her, the actor admitted he’s felt inadequate, too, that his continued career is only because he’s wed to Spelling. “I feel like a fat-a**ed, small-d*cked… piece of sh*t,” confessed McDermott, leading Spelling to admit she’s been “mad for years” about that dynamic.
The next day, McDermott was “overwhelmed” at home, but felt “blessed” to be spending time with their children as Spelling went out with her girlfriends and to a work meeting. McDermott enlisted a friend, the husband of one of Spelling’s gal pals, to help him make dinner for the family, and he admitted everything feels “really raw and sensitive.” Asked point-blank why he “jeopardized everything,” McDermott hesitated before replying, “Because I didn’t think that I would get caught.” “I was drinking and using drugs, man,” he went on. “I have a brain that wants me dead. That’s how the alcoholic mind thinks.”
McDermott noted, “I’m on the verge of losing everything that means anything to me in this world,” before confessing he was held involuntarily in the psych ward at UCLA when his affair came out. “I wanted to die. I was going to take my own life,” he revealed, worrying that working now to feel the “pain” he’s put Spelling through might put him “over the edge.”
But as a “homework assignment” for therapy, McDermott was forced to write his wife an “apology letter,” though he was interrupted by their son Liam. “How do you tell a 7-year-old that your dad is a douchebag, that your dad hurt your mom really badly?” he wondered to the camera, ultimately telling him just that he did “something unforgivable.”
As Spelling wrote her own letter, in which she was supposed to let her anger out, she wondered where it all “fell apart,” before telling the camera that “everything changed” when kids entered the picture. And while Spelling felt she changed for the better because of it, and their life was enhanced, “I think he felt like he was gypped a little bit,” adding that they “let go everything that they started with.”
The pair went on to have a tiff as McDermott made dinner for the family, with the “Chopped Canada” host getting insulted when she said his wing sauce seemed “watered down.” “Thanks for making me look like an a**” as a chef on camera, he snapped at her. Spelling was surprised by his serious reaction, and told him, “No offense, but everything we’re dealing with on this show, and that’s what you’re worried about?”
They later had another argument when McDermott became unhappy that all of their kids wanted to stay in their bedroom for the night, prompting him to snipe to Spelling, “You make this very difficult. Just put them in bed!” In private, Spelling told him, “I feel like in front of the kids you’re getting mad at me,” and discussed how this was the norm during McDermott’s absence. “You’ve been gone for months and it’s just hard to break that now,” she said, to which McDermott replied, “I want to be in my bed, with my wife… I’m a grown man sleeping in a single [kid’s] bed.” He further told her, “It doesn’t make you a good mom to give the kids everything they want.” But Spelling told the camera that it was about more than that: “Maybe in mama’s bed is where I still want them and need them.”
At their next therapy session, the former “90210” star expressed her love for him and their kids without fulfilling the “anger” portion of her assignment, and then McDermott read his letter.
“I’m so sorry for the self-indulgent, egotistical, self-seeking, arrogant behavior that took place in Toronto. I took the sanctity of our marriage for granted. I took you for granted. I hurt you so bad. I wouldn’t want to be that hurt and feel pain like that. It would kill me. And to think of you with someone else like that, it would utterly destroy me. It would destroy me.”
But Spelling felt the note was missing “remorse,” and angrily said that she was giving him “and our family 100 percent,” and preparing for Christmas alone while he off cheating. The comments seemed to trigger an anxiety attack for McDermott, who began clutching his head and shaking as he teared up. “I feel shame like I never felt shame before. You were at a Christmas event and I was f*cking around. That’s disgusting. I can’t go to that hurt. I can’t,” McDermott said as he melted down more and more (photo above). Spelling began to panic as well, telling the doctor, “He’s not okay. This is not okay. He can’t handle it. I don’t trust that it’s okay at all.” And from there, it will be continued…