(GettyImages.com)

So what’s next for Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart after the box office success of “The Twilight Saga: New Moon”?

“Rob & Kristen Eager for Baby” announces the always (ahem) reliable National Enquirer.

Oh, boy.

“Great news!” the tab trumpets. “A baby ‘vampire’ will be winging its way to ‘Twilight’ co-stars – and off-screen lovers – Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson.”

Yeah, this is going to be even sillier than we thought.

A “source close to the couple” tells the tabloid, “Kristen and Rob want to have kids.” “While they initially felt they were too young, those fears seem to have evaporated,” the source continues, “They feel having a baby would cement their love.”

A “close source” confides the two “would like to be married before having a baby… but if Kristen gets pregnant before they get hitched, that’s OK, too.”

Curious about how the Enquirer backs up its bombshell assertions?

“Back in July, an Australian publication claimed Kristen was pregnant… it turned out she was not pregnant… but they’re working on it.”

You mean this Australian publication? The one that was – as the Enquirer admits – 100% wrong?

Oh, but that’s not all! “The starry-eyed stars were recently snapped holding hands at a Paris airport and were seen cuddling at a concert in August,” the Enquirer whispers.

Cuddling and holding hands??

Gossip Cop takes it back. That’s EXACTLY how vampire babies are made. We remember from vampire sex ed.

Follow @GossipCop on Twitter for the latest in accurate celebrity reporting, and check GossipCop.com for updates!

(Summit)

“The Twilight Saga: New Moon” opens tonight (have you heard?), and in light of Robert Pattinson being “confronted” (in good fun) on “The Today Show” this morning with a series of crazy rumors, Gossip Cop decided to compile a little trip down memory lane with our Top 20 Wrong “Twilight” Rumors from the last few speculation-saturated months.

There were, of course, the endless (endless, endless) Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart romance rumors, the problems with obnoxious paparazzi, issues with fake photos, crazy casting rumors involving “Harry Potter,” then ridiculous romance rumors involving “Harry Potter,” fake “Twilight”-bashing Tweets from Lauren Bacall (no, really), and more.

But here are the 20 that together helped to define the “Twilight” Tabloid Experience between the summer and tonight’s theatrical release. They’re fun, they’re wild, they’re crazy… and they’re wrong.

20. Robert Pattinson + Megan Fox = ???

Teen Choice Awards co-presenters make mistake of co-presenting in same time zone. All hell breaks loose.

19. Kristen Stewart “Tweets” Up a Storm

Unfortunately, it seems only one magazine has access.

18. Taylor Swift “Teaches” Taylor Lautner in Hotel Room

They supposedly jam until the wee hours while guests cover ears and mag’s fact checkers cover eyes.

17. “Looking Like Hell,” Cast of “Eclipse” Placed on “Lockdown”

Star magazine insists out-of-control stars get curfew. We think the editors need more sleep.

16. “Breaking Dawn” Production Rumors Just… Won’t… Stop

Every few days “news” of a fourth movie taking shape trickles from the Northwest. And one day it’ll be true. But not yet.

15. Kristen Stewart Scream 2009 Rumors… She Didn’t Go

Everyone kept insisting she’d attend the awards. We trusted our “no” sources. Disappointing news can be accurate news.

14. Robert Pattinson is a Teleporter

Outlet doesn’t get memo to wait until actor is in New York to generate fake New York rumors.

13. “Snobby,” “Miserable” Kristen Stewart is “Eclipse” “Outcast”

Actually, the entire smear piece could be placed inside quotation marks and then dumped in the water outside Vancouver.

12. New York Daily News Fakes Jennie Garth Quotes

Transcript shows paper exaggerated Peter Facinelli’s wife’s comments “outing” Robsten, but not as ridiculously as…

11. Site Fakes and Creates Chris Weitz Quotes

Blog manufactures director’s statement “outing” Robsten, fails Comedy 101.

10. Robsten’s Fantasy Island

Not satisfied with mainland rumors, tabs conjure an exaggerated couple’s getaway, albeit one more plausible than…

9. Taylor Lautner “Proposes” to Taylor Swift

We’d like to propose that certain outlets just take a “Twilight” timeout.

8. Phony Interview with Robert Pattinson Goes Everywhere

Gossip Cop actually called the perpetrators on this one – and got results.

7. Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart “Keeping a Safe Distance”

Perez Hilton manages to pick up wrong story and make it 10,000 times wronger.

6. OK! Magazine Loves Robsten Rollercoaster a Little Too Much

We just got motion sickness reliving the tab’s topsy-turvy approach to reality.

5. Robert Pattinson’s Alleged Steroids Use

Mangled, out-of-context Kristen Stewart quotes generate ‘juiced’ rumors.

4. Robert Pattinson on Verge of Rehab

“His shirt was once buttoned all weird.” We’re not making this up.

3. Robert Pattinson “Injured” on “New Moon” Set

A blog alarms everyone by showing the actor bloodied… and fails to mention that it was makeup for a scene.

2. Robert Pattinson “In Mix” to Play Levi Johnston

No comment.

1. Robert Pattinson Impregnates Kristen Stewart

Due any day now…

****     ****     ****     ****     ****     ****     ****

Glaring omissions? Personal favorites? Let us know in the comments section!

Follow @GossipCop on Twitter for the latest in accurate celebrity reporting, and check GossipCop.com for updates.

(GettyImages.com)

“Thanksgiving in Courteney Cox’s house is certain to go off with a bang this year,” reports the Aussie mag NW.

According to the Down Under weekly, Cox is hosting Thanksgiving “and guess who’s on her guest list?”

Give up?

“Her BFF Jenifer Aniston and Jen’s ex-husband Brad Pitt!” exclaims the tab.

But will he show?

NW has a so-called source who says, “Brad said they’d stop by if they were in town.”

“They’d?” “They?”

You mean?

That’s right. Since Cox and Pitt have reportedly remained friends, NW claims she’s “even extended the dinner invitation to Brad’s new partner Angelina Jolie and their six young kids.”

At the end of the article NW longingly says, “We’d give anything to be a fly on that wall.”

And we’re the fly swatter. 

When Gossip Cop contacted a source close to Cox, the insider responded, “LOL… doubt it.”

Actually, does anyone not doubt it?

For the most accurate celebrity reporting, follow @GossipCop on Twitter, and check GossipCop.com for updates!

(NW Magazine)

The glow Australians see around Britney Spears as she tours their country for the first time this month might be because she probably spends a lot of time laughing at the latest nonsense the tabloids churn.

Now from the people who fabricated plans for a lavish Spears wedding down under comes word that the pop icon will use this portion of her tour to conceive.

You read correctly.

“Britney is so psyched about coming to Australia,” a so-called “close source” tells NW magazine.

Psyched to give some great performances, right? No, that’s not all according to NW.

“The ideal scenario would be for her to get pregnant while they’re on this trip.”

What?

Yes, it seems that since Spears chose not to marry in Oz, the mag has decided she’ll do the next best thing.

Friend Taylor Clyne says Britney’s “made huge strides in the last year,” and boyfriend Jason Trawick “has been a big part of that… She knows he’ll make an amazing father and she wants to get started on building a family with him.”

Immediately? As in, before she even leaves Australia? Um, how exactly would a “source” know this “baby bombshell” in the first place?

Well, the “source” doesn’t. There is no baby agenda. Just like there were no wedding plans last month. Just like there were no wedding plans four months ago when NW put a Britney “engagement” on the same cover that infamously claimed Kristen Stewart was pregnant.

A source close to Spears tells Gossip Cop that she plans on performing in Australia, not procreating.

***   ***   ***   ***   ***   ***   ***   ***   ***

For the latest in accurate celebrity reporting, follow @GossipCop on Twitter and check out GossipCop.com.

And thanks to the always helpful @OzTwilightTwit for sending us scans of the article.

(GettyImages.com)

Gossip Cop didn’t think it was possible, but one tabloid has managed to stoop even lower when it comes to ”reporting” on Robert Pattinson.

Having already claimed he got his co-star Kristen Stewart pregnant, NW found so-called “friends” of the “Twilight” star to say the actor is “drinking to excess and indulging in other dangerous behavior.” ”His people are very worried and starting to think he should go to rehab,” the rag quotes a “pal” as saying. The tabloid claims Pattinson parties constantly in a luxury suite with three bars, “which are restocked every day.”

Funny how that absurd OK! magazine piece from “inside” the same suite described a completely different scene and lifestyle.

Maybe because neither magazine is doing anything beyond reckless speculation?

“He loves the dive bar Loose Moose,” a supposed “source” says, “where fights break out in the middle of the day and the nights are wild.” And how does Pattinson emerge from such a cartoonishly described saloon?

“On several occasions his clothes have been stained with puke, and his shirt was once buttoned all weird.”

His shirt was weirdly buttoned? Send him to rehab!!

We love how NW contends the actor “has been tearing it up in Vancouver and living his celebrity lifestyle to the extreme” when the news from every outlet for months has been that the camera-shy Pattinson works hard, sees a few concerts, stays in his hotel, and is generally low key.

What we don’t love is how every tab and gossip site seems to generate new ridiculous rumors about Pattinson and his “Twilight” colleagues each week.

Gossip Cop has been speaking to people close to “Eclipse” and its stars for three months. No one has ever even hinted at Robert Pattinson drinking too much, let alone staging “a series of out-of-control benders.” We think it’s pretty shameful, even by tabloid standards, to write such nonsense with such weak “evidence.”

Hat tip to Robert Pattinson Life for scanning the article.

For the most accurate celebrity news reporting, check out GossipCop.com and follow us on Twitter – @GossipCop.