(PerezHilton.com)

“Madonna Has A New Man?” asks Perez Hilton, who rarely has the right answer.

Picking up on a New York Post piece, Perez writes, “After reportedly splitting recently from Jesus Luz, Madonna has found herself a new man in choreographer Brahim Rachiki!”

Really?

Perez then regurgitates how Madonna was spotted at the New York hotspot SL, where she “got up and was dancing for an hour straight before going back to her man” and “making out” with him.

He then notes Madonna and Rachiki then headed to another joint called the Sullivan Room for more dancing and kissing.

So, are reports about the superstar dating Brahim Rachiki accurate?

“Not true,” Madonna tells Gossip Cop via her rep.

Any questions?

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(GettyImages.com)

Since The Sun is often written like a mediocre junior high newspaper, it makes sense that it would mistake schoolyard dynamics for actual news.

“Former pals Madonna and Gwyneth Paltrow have done nothing to end rumours of a fall-out,” reports the outlet.

The “rumours,” based almost entirely on out-of-context quotes, have been around for months without being the least bit true.

What did the Sun witness that breathed new life into the nonsense? Were Madonna and Paltrow seen yelling at each other? Were there nasty remarks in the press? Have “sources” come forward with corroboration?

Um, no.

When Jay-Z performed in London on Sunday, Madonna and Paltrow happened to watch “from completely separate VIP areas.”

That’s it.

Madonna had the audacity to stand near her daughter Lourdes and boyfriend Jesus Luz, while Paltrow hung out with another buddy, Beyonce.

The Sun‘s reasoning boils down to a bizarrely childlike belief that getting a new friend means dumping an old one, and that you can’t be seen in public with your family because it’s totally embarrassing.

A source close to Paltrow tells Gossip Cop there’s still nothing to claims of a feud.

Unfortunately, when outlets use logic as baffling as the Sun‘s, the rumors might be around for a while.

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(GettyImages.com)

Is Madonna planning to commemorate her birth by turning back the clock?

According to the Daily Star, the Queen of Pop is considering a small fortune worth of plastic surgery as a birthday gift to herself.

Among the purported procedures are an eye lift, a boob job, lip fillers and Lipo Sculpt, as well as laser treatments and Botox.

Projected cost: Somewhere in the neighborhood of $147,000.

“Madonna has been feeling her age since her divorce from Guy Ritchie in 2008,” a “source” tells the paper, later adding, “Her friends have recommended things to have done and she’s considering them as a little treat for turning 52 in August.”

A “pal” explains that she will spend the next year “overhauling herself completely.”

Maybe the Daily Star should consider an overhaul.

Because Madonna isn’t planning a major cosmetic offensive in August.

“Madonna is directing a movie all summer,” her rep tells Gossip Cop, confirming that there’s “no plastic surgery on her calendar.”

The notion that Madonna is going the Full Montag is “all fiction,” says the rep.

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(HollywoodLife.com)

“Madonna & Jesus Luz Are Back Together — And Partying In Brazil With Her Daughters!” blares HollywoodLife.

Madonna and Jesus Luz “are definitely back on, as the two were spotted celebrating Valentine’s Day at the Rio Carnival in Rio De Janeiro,” reports the facts-deprived site, “While they sipped on bubbly and took in all the outrageous sites, Jesus doted on Madonna’s daughters, 14-year-old Lourdes and newly adopted Mercy. Whatever issues led to Madonna and Jesus’ temporary split seem to be completely resolved.”

Or…

Perhaps HollywoodLife relied too much on unsubstantiated rumors that the couple had broken up in the first place, which they did NOT.

While their romance might not be Camelot, the two never broke up, just like Madonna never had a romantic reconciliation with Sean Penn, as the site wrongly reported.

Follow @GossipCop on Twitter for the latest in accurate celebrity news!

(GettyImages.com)

In a piece titled, “Madonna Spending Time With A-Rod Again,” Hollyscoop claims, “We’re getting word that [Alex Rodriguez has] been spending a lot of time with his ex Madonna.”

A lot of time?! Really?!

The story goes on to quote a so-called source who says, “Madonna spent two nights with him in his beach house in Miami last week and Jesus [Luz] had no idea.”

Hollyscoop has no idea.

Madonna wasn’t in Miami with Rodriguez last week.

A rep for Madonna confirms to Gossip Cop, “None of this is true,” and an A-Rod source also says it didn’t happen.

The two, however, remain friendly.

Follow @GossipCop on Twitter for the MOST accurate celebrity reporting

(GettyImages.com)

Although Madonna met in Brazil with Sao Paulo Governor Jose Serra to discuss ways to help country’s needy children, the politician — who’s likely to run for president there — seemed a little too focused on her appearance.

In addition to telling assembled reporters that Madonna wants to help Brazil’s poor kids, he oddly noted of the 51-year-old singer: “She seems very young, much less than her (age).”

Perhaps that’s the key to her connection with the much younger Jesus Luz, with whom she was spotted earlier sharing an intimate dinner at Boticella restaurant in Rio de Janeiro, followed by a stop at a nightclub.

Gossip Cop is not sure what impresses us more — her youthful appearance or the work she does for needy children.

We’re kidding. What she does globally for kids is truly incredible. 

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(GettyImages.com)

“She’s Smart,” is a headline about Madonna from Perez Hilton. But is he?

Perez, who blocks Gossip Cop on Twitter because he’s afraid of us, just posted a piece about Madonna’s recent visit to boyfriend Jesus Luz’s homeland of Brazil. “Touring the lawless city of Dona Marta,” says Perez, “her Madgesty insisted on wearing a bullet-proof vest under her leather jacket.”

He adds, “Good call!”

No, bad call.

Madonna did NOT wear a bulletproof vest. Her rep reiterated that the story is “absolutely not true,” and that media types like “Cop Blocker” Hilton still went with it, despite being told it was inaccurate.

The only thing the media fortunately did get right was that Madonna raised a whopping $10 million from local businessmen to build a school in the poverty-stricken area.

For the most accurate celebrity reporting, check GossipCop.com for updates and follow @GossipCop on Twitter — we don’t block anyone!

(GettyImages.com)

The tabs are so obsessed with Madonna‘s Jesus Luz relationship you’d think they’d spend a few minutes on minor distractions like details.

The pop icon is “slightly on edge,” the Sun reports, as she supposedly jets off to meet her boyfriend’s parents in Brazil, “fuelling talk she’ll marry him.” The visit is “her way of saying she will make this relationship permanent,” a “close family pal” told the paper.

Not surprisingly, Perez “Cop Blocker” Hilton also got the purpose of the visit wrong.

While it is true Madonna is flying into Rio de Janeiro, she isn’t taking her cues from “Meet the Parents.” The Sun and dozens of other outlets fail to mention the actual reason for the trip: to raise money for humanitarian programs in the spirit of her Raising Malawi organization. Plans to meet with local business leaders have been on Madonna’s Brazil agenda for a long time.

She may well meet with her beau’s family – but Gossip Cop thinks the confirmed charity work should at least be mentioned alongside the prospective in-laws visit.

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(GettyImages.com)

It pays to be Madonna’s boy toy – no, really pays, says In Touch.

The tab reports that Jesus Luz put his modeling career on hold to schlep across the world with Madonna. “Jesus basically lived paycheck to paycheck before he met Madonna,” says a so-called “source,” who adds that his bills and money issues are now all taken care of by his girlfriend.

According to In Touch’s supposed source, “Madonna gives him about $10,000 a month to cover his expenses, including his cell phone, insurance and credit card payments.”

Madonna’s rep categorically denies the story, which got picked up everywhere, telling Gossip Cop, “This is not true.”

Of recent, the press has been obsessed with making Madonna a sugar mama, incorrectly reporting that she was shelling out $2.7 million to buy him an apartment near her home (where he can live, um, rent-free).

Actually, if anything, Luz has made some loot while dating Madonna by getting a bunch of deejaying and modeling gigs.

(GettyImages.com)

We’ll keep this one short and sweet.

Fresh off her “Sticky & Sweet” tour, Madonna reportedly wants to keep her boyfriend Jesus Luz close. Really close. A number of outlets claim she is buying her “toyboy lover” a $2.7 million apartment within walking distance of her New York townhouse. According to a “source,” Madonna “has her real estate agent searching for the perfect pad for him” in her new neighborhood.

If only all Manhattan housing hunts were so easy. Unfortunately for Jesus, Gossip Cop confirmed with a rep for Madonna that the story is “not true.”

(GettyImages.com)

According to The Sun, David Letterman wasn’t the only one to cause relationship strife with comments on his late night program last week.

The paper claims Madonna‘s admission that “she’d rather get hit by a train than get hitched again” triggered trouble with young boyfriend Jesus Luz.

A source tells the paper the two almost never fight, but that Luz had told friends he was planning to marry Madonna, and her comments to Letterman “had made a fool of him.” He “was heartbroken to learn in such a public way they weren’t on the same page,” the source adds.

“They had a huge row afterwards,” reports the paper, adding, “It was a serious ding-dong.”

Sorry, but we have to ding this ridiculous rumor. Madonna’s rep tells Gossip Cop talk of a fight is “not true.”

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According to Hello! magazine, “Madonna and Jesus Reveal Wedding Plans to Pals.”

No problem with your vision – you read that right.

Celebrity biographer Randy Taraborrelli writes in the magazine that the 51-year-old singer and the 22-year-old model “may marry before the end of the year.”

Or, they may not.

Nevertheless, Taraborreli even quotes Madge as saying – via unnamed third parties – that “it’s definitely on the table.’”

So what kind of affair will these alleged nuptials be? According to the piece, Madonna “is said to want yet another lavish ceremony.” Really? And why is that? Well, Taraborrelli quotes yet another unnamed source saying, “She knows that’s what Jesus wants… She has a lot of wonderful memories of both of her weddings. She doesn’t want to slip off and do it quietly. She definitely wants a big and rather fantastic affair.”

How divine!

Gossip Cop is going to hold off sending a wedding gift. Madonna’s rep joked, “I’ll let you know where they’re registering,” but told Gossip Cop the story simply isn’t true.

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Demi Moore was in Gossip Cop a couple of times this week. First, it was inaccurately reported that she was going to be in a few episodes of “The Beautiful Life,” produced by her husband Ashton Kutcher. But much more notably, “The G.I. Jane” star was in a battle with Perez “Scoop” Hilton.

Moore had had enough of Perez making lewd remarks about her 15-year-old daughter Tallulah. She rightfully objected to Perez tweeting out a photo of Tallulah’s partially exposed breasts with the comment “slut,” and a post in which the bad blogger showed a photo of the minor, hugging her dad Bruce Willis, with the word “ass” written over an area to point out where her jean shorts inadvertently rode up a little to expose a bit of her behind. Moore noted the inappropriateness when she tweeted, “Let me ask all of you, what is it called when someone is telling people to look and focus on a child’s ‘boobs & ass’ while providing photos?” Gossip Cop felt the only “ass” in this battle was Pervy Perez.

Actually Perez was (predictably) wrong about a bunch of things this week. He began the week by floating the rumor that Tyra Banks was engaged, based on a photo of her wearing a ring. Gossip Cop shot it down, explaining it was simply her old high school ring that the TV hostess often wears. Perez also picked up from dubious sources and reported as fact a ludicrous story about Madonna training for a 6-day, 151- mile marathon in Morocco. If you recall it was not only a tall tale that was proven false by Gossip Cop, but it was also one we debunked a loooong time ago. Again Perez was wrong and late, and not “late” as in the “late Fidel Castro.” Ha!

On the subject of Madonna, there were a few stories that were incorrect about her this week. One had Justin Timberlake jetting off to Israel to perform at her concerts. But Gossip Cop found the Israel story was not real.  We did, however, accurately report that Madonna and boyfriend Jesus Luz went to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s Jerusalem home to light Sabbath candles. And despite being with Luz, In Touch reported that now that Sean Penn is getting divorced, he and Madonna will get back together. Totally false.

In the Random Rumor cop needed section, Gossip Cop called Chris Brown out on his faulty memory. He claimed on “Larry King Live” that he didn’t remember beating Rihanna, but Gossip Cop reminded him that he knew exactly what he did since he told People magazine, “I went to my mom on the same night and told [her] what happened and broke down.” We also pointed out how off Radar was when it said Salma Hayek had thrown a fit at the Chateau Marmont because its restaurant wouldn’t serve her without a reservation. While it’s true she was at the Chateau Marmont after having had a birthday dinner, she did not have a tantrum of any sort when she met her family and friends for drinks at the famed hotel. Radar has since pulled down its false report.

The Star had a series of questionable articles. First, its cover said that Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott were in a “loveless” marriage, and that the relationship “has been a lie from the get-go!” The source for the (mis)information was an alleged pal of McDermott who said on the record, “There is no question Dean is with Tori for the money and the fame,” and that their marriage is rooted in Dean’s desperation for the spotlight. Not only did her rep say the story wasn’t true, but Tori herself even tweeted, “R they kiddin? DON’T believe. Uggh. Hate tabloid lies!” We didn’t believe that Star story or the one that Ashlee Simpson-Wentz is talking to divorce lawyers after she suspected that her rocker husband Pete Wentz was cheating on her. Ashlee has since tweeted about missing her husband and son Bronx, and even a rep for the couple dismissed talk of a divorce as “absolutely not true.”

We reported as fact details of Selena Gomez’s trip to Ghana as a new UNICEF Ambassador. Gomez’s rep told Gossip Cop that the young star was in Africa “looking at UNICEF child survival programs,” and in the future would be “involved in educating, advocating, and fundraising” for UNICEF.”

Another true story was Russell Crowe beating a gossip columnist. The Daily Telegraph mocked Crowe for a fitness regimen of “smokes and fatty foods” after the Oscar winner was pictured having snacks and a cigarette during a break from biking. So he challenged a gossip columnist to a bicycle race through Sydney, which he easily won.

Fellow Aussie star Nicole Kidman was the target of an old rumor. In Touch reported Kidman’s kids Connor and Isabella no longer call her “mom,” and instead simply call her “Nicole.” These days, the weekly claimed, they call Katie Holmes “mom.” Once again In Touch was out of touch.

Gawker got it wrong and wrong in a piece titled, “Cosmetics Company Uses Kristin Davis and Then Kicks Her Out.” The story began, “Ahava Dead Sea Laboratories, hired Sex and the City’s Kristin Davis to help their image. Because she worked with the disputed company, she got the boot from human rights group Oxfam International. Now Ahava is giving her the heave-ho too!” It was not true that the “Sex and the City” star was fired from the Palestinian-leaning Oxfam International, with whom she still has a relationship nor was it accurate that she was let go by the Israeli company Ahava. Rather, her contract with the beauty goods company expired.  Gawker has since updated its site to reflect its two mistakes.

And Eric Dane and Rebecca Gayheart, the subjects of a recently leaked naked video, were accused in the National Enquirer of doing lines of cocaine at a Hollywood Hills party last year. The only lines there were the lines fed by a so-called source. A rep for the two stars told Gossip Cop it was a “bunch of lies. If it happened, where are the photos?”

Rest assured, Gossip Cop is on the beat this week patrolling the blogs, magazines, and TV shows so that you get the truth, and nothing but the truth.

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Although it sounds like it could be a made up story, similar to the kind that keep Gossip Cop busy every day, it is one hundred percent true that earlier today, Madonna and boyfriend Jesus Luz visited the home of Israel’s Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu, and lit the traditional Sabbath candles that Jews do on Friday evenings.

Although Madonna is not Jewish, she is a fervent adherent of Kabbalah, a branch of Jewish mysticism.

Gossip Cop hears not only did Madonna spend two hours with the Prime Minister, but she also recited the blessing over the candles in Hebrew with Netanyahu’s wife.

(GettyImages.com)

Though they’ve been divorced for 20 years, dated scores of individuals and, oh yeah, even married other people, In Touch has a source who says, “Madonna still considers Sean [Penn] her soulmate,” and even goes so far as to suggest, “It’s highly possible that she and Sean will somehow get back together now that they’ll both be divorced.”

Highly possible?

No one should tell her boyfriend Jesus Luz, who she schlepped to the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem.

Seriously, Madonna’s rep tells Gossip Cop that while her client and Penn have been friendly for a long time now, “nothing’s accelerated because they are both divorced.”

Sorry folks . . . there will be no “Shanghai Surprise 2.”