Lindsay Finale Shocker: Lohan Reveals She Had A Secret Miscarriage — FULL RECAP
By Shari Weiss | 10:59 pm, April 20th, 2014
The finale kicked off with Lohan arriving late for her car-smashing (and free) appearance on “Billy on the Street,” complaining of a “really bad chest cold.”
Now 127 days out of rehab, the star next headed to Miami for December’s Art Basel festival, where she wanted to relax in the sun and skip events.
Production didn’t travel with Lohan for the trip, but she turned the camera on herself, showcasing the exclusive and luxurious Star Island — and skipping the alleged violent altercation with Paris Hilton’s younger brother.
Explained Lohan’s assistant Matt Harrell, “One of the guests, Barron Hilton, refused to leave after [getting asked by] the homeowner Ray. They ended up getting into a heated argument, and Barron got punched, and Lindsay got blamed for it.”
Asked by director Amy Rice about the tabloid stories in the wake of the fight, Lohan replied “I’m not going to explain… Because I had been a guest at the house a few days prior to stuff going down, my name was involved, which, it is what it is. It’s frustrating, because I didn’t have any part in it.”
The star went on to complain to Harrell about the prolonged, sensationalized media coverage, and wanted to post her side of the story on her website, but ultimately didn’t when her team advised against it.
Lohan later blew off some steam at a restaurant, where her friends drank and spoke about getting high.
“It’s learning to [find] a way to live so you can still have fun, but without drugs and alcohol in your life,” she told the camera, saying when she gets tempted, she flashes back to all the horrible things that came from her addiction, and that keeps her in check.
Lohan also relied on her community service at the Duffield Children’s Center in Brooklyn to lift her spirits (and fulfill the terms of her probation), but admitted to the camera that she really wishes the court would say she’s done enough “after all these years.”
“I’ve managed to make changes in my life, with me as a person, that allows me to live a life that maybe I wasn’t ready for before,” she acknowledged. “It’s calm down a bit more. It’s been more productive. Before I was getting bored and antsy. That’s never a good place for me.”
The actress later went to her biggest public appearance (another one she did for free) since leaving rehab — introducing Miley Cyrus at Jingle Ball at Madison Square Garden — explaining that she likes such events because it’s a way to connect with fans, a “blessing” she’s “grateful” for.
Before a business meeting, Lohan lamented to the camera, “I’m tired of not getting cast in movies… There’s all these other people living this life, and I have to be willing to do something, whatever it takes, to get that back.”
She explained that she realized, “It must be the going out, it must be creating distractions for myself, not letting myself move forward. I just want to be making movies, starring in them producing them, and years from now directing them.”
The former child star met with Inconceivable producer Hilary Schor, who said being in the film would “reestablish” that Lohan is “an incredibly talented actress.”
“I think there are concerns with any young actor…,” Schor said told the camera. “[But] I think she’s 100 percent committed, and at a state in her life where she really wants to get back to work.”
The final hour began with Lohan getting interviewed by Jared Leto for his star-studded video about Los Angeles, with the actress nearly 150 days out of rehab and happy to be settled and feeling at home in New York.
“I was lonely in L.A. a lot. I was kind of just lost for a while,” she confessed. “I have a good support system in New York. It’s really just who you surround yourself with, and I didn’t know that for a while, because I was in denial. It’s more comfortable to have the yes people than the no people.”
Now believing she has a “life worth living,” Lohan moved forward with her career, arriving on time to a shoot for Nylon Singapore, and the photographer had nothing but effusive phrase for her.
Lohan loved the experience, pointing out that, in contrast, paparazzi just “wait til you’re sneezing to say you’re crying,” and went on to meet with a literary agent about a possible “multi-million dollar” book deal.
She explained, “I love writing… I have a lot of things to say that I feel people will relate to in different ways. So if I can help someone by putting my words on paper, then that’s the reason to do it.”
Lohan’s next appearance came with her brother, Michael, at the launch party for their karaoke app Just Sing It, where — after fans left — she was again surrounded by alcohol.
Michael told the camera, “She’s slowly developing these skills that she needs to say no here, to say no there, to kick herself in the butt when she needs to.”
“She knows that if you’re thinking clearly and you’re focused, there’s nothing you can’t do,” he went on. “Even if there is a relapse, it’s not the end of the world. There’s always hope, and there’s always people that are going to care about you.”
And Lohan said, “I have friends that are not sober… People are going to drink around me, that’s not not going to be a part of my life… They wouldn’t be around me drinking if they knew I couldn’t handle it, and that’s how I know they’re my friends.”
The star later traveled to Shanghai to receive a fashion achievement award and do a shoot for a Chinese publication, before heading to January’s Sundance Film Festival in Utah to formally announce Inconceivable.
“My short term goals are to start this movie and finish this movie. Hopefully start another movie right after. My priority is to be on set,” said Lohan.
Harrell, now working with Lohan for seven months, said their “working relationship is okay” after some bumps along the way, before admitting he was returning to L.A., but hoped to work with her again soon.
“It’s complicated, but I can’t really discuss because of the confidentiality agreement,” he told the camera.
The documentary showcased tabloid headlines alleging Harrell quit because Lohan could no longer afford to pay him when the show wrapped regular filming.
Fast-forwarding to March, after the project’s premiere and six weeks after Harrell left, Lohan brought him back to New York, and he debunked the rumors about pay issues, but noted the job would be taken “day-by-day” now “like anything else in life.”
“It’s strange how things fall into place in life, when you’re in a good place and you’re okay with being a good place,” the star said afterward.
But Lohan ran into a hiccup when her landlord wanted to sell her apartment, even though she signed a 2-year lease, and jokingly vowed to “scare away” prospective buyers.
And then major trouble came with the now-infamous leaked “sex list.”
“That was part of my Betty Ford — it’s step number 5 or step number 8. It’s your sexual inventory. So that was really personal to my sponsor,” explained Lohan. “When I was moving, there were two people there that helped me move…. Someone took a photo, and I’m pretty sure I know who it is, unfortunately.”
The starlet said that person released the photo to the tabloids, and the individual is no longer in her life.
She went on, “And that’s not about me. I don’t care about me in that situation. I care about the people who are involved with other people, because it’s really unfortunate and unfair to other people.”
“The fact that that happened was not only humiliating but it was just mean. It was mean-spirited for someone to do that. That’s a desperate human being [who is] really f*cked up in the head,” she added.
Asked to reflect on the documentary experience, Lohan told the director, “I cried so many times watching it.”
Then she got emotional.
“No one knows this – I had a miscarriage for those two weeks that I took off,” she shockingly confessed, saying the times she didn’t want to film were because she “couldn’t move.”
“I was sick. And mentally that messes with you,” said Lohan.
She did NOT name the father of the baby, but noted there’s “a very long story” surrounding the traumatic event.
“Watching this series, I just know how I felt at that moment and I can relate to that girl. It sounds kind of crazy,” Lohan said. “I’m like, ‘oh my god, this is really sad. Who’s helping her?’”
She continued through tears , “Even if it’s not my intention to lose everything I’ve worked for, that’s what my addiction will do to me… It’s a really f*cked up disease, and it’s really scary. Because there are drugs people have said that I’ve done that I’ve never touched.”
Now Lohan said she was looking forward to shooting her movie in June.
“I’m happy,” she said. “The biggest thing I learned from his experience and doing this show is my work ethic is different. I have that fire back in me.”
And with that, it was over.
What do YOU think of Lohan’s big reveal?