Charlie Sheen Rants About Chuck Lorre, “Trolls,” AA and the Vatican

Truth rating: 10

By Daniel Gates


Charlie Sheen went off during a radio interview today, ranting about everything from “Two and a Half Men” creator Chuck Lorre to Alcoholics Anonymous in an epic diatribe. During his rambling screed on “The Alex Jones Show,” Sheen blasted Lorre as a “charlatan” and “turd” whose “tin can” material Sheen “effortlessly and magically convert[s]… into pure gold.” “I am so tired of pretending like my life isn’t perfect and bitchin’ and just winning every second,” bragged Sheen at one point, expressing frustration having to deal with “fools and trolls.”

Sheen also scorns Alcoholics Anonymous, which he calls “the work of sissies” and a “bootleg cult” with a five percent success rate. “My success rate is 100 percent. Do the math!” continues Sheen, who says he cured himself with his own mind. Sheen rejects what he labels the AA motto of “don’t be special, be one of us,” telling Jones, “News flash: I am special, and I will never be one of you… I’m going to hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here, but I sure like the view.” “The only thing I’m addicted to right now is winning,” he says, at another point declaring, “I got magic… I got poetry at my fingertips.”

In one of several seemingly incomprehensible exchanges with radio interviewer Jones, Sheen refers to the two of them as “Vatican assassin warlocks.” At another point in the conversation he rejects a comparison to one of the Founding Fathers by saying, “I’m not Thomas Jefferson. He was a p-ssy.” Wow.

But that wasn’t all for Sheen today. This afternoon, he called TMZ and challenged “Two and a Half Men” creator Chuck Lorre to a fight in an octagon. “If he wins, then he can leave my show,” said Sheen.

He later went on to say that he “violently hate[s]” Lorre, whom he further calls “a stupid, stupid little man” and a “p-ssy punk that I’d never want to be like.” Sheen added, “That piece of s–t took money out of my pocket, my family’s pocket, and, most importantly, my second family – my crew’s pocket.” “You can tell him one thing. I own him.” Whoa. What do you make of Sheen’s rants?

Enter your email address here to receive daily news updates from us.


  1. Gossip Cop
  2. Mediaite
  3. RunwayRiot
  4. The Mary Sue