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CLAIM: Disgruntled Staffer to Spill Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt’s “Deepest Secrets”

Truth rating: 0

(GettyImages.com)

When Star magazine plays “connect the dots,” things get very tangled, very fast.

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie used to have an employee named Ana Charlotiaux, who worked at their Chateau Miraval country estate in France between 2008 and 2010.

Charlotiaux is reportedly suing the couple for unfair dismissal after she allegedly took too much time off.

A tribunal is set to deliver a verdict on the matter sometime in early 2012.

Star somehow sees this as reason for Pitt and Jolie to live in terror that Charlotiaux “will spill their deepest secrets in a shocking tell-all if her demands are not sufficiently met.”

Huh?

“There has always been a mystery about how Angie and Brad can run a film production company, make movies and still have time to look after six kids,” explains writer Andrew Morton, trying to make Chateau Miraval sound as inexplicable as Willy Wonka’s factory.

He speculates that Charlotiaux “will be able to give vivid insight into the unvarnished, unairbrushed world of Angelina and Brad.”

In other words, according to the Star story, a woman who briefly worked for the couple and was fired for not being there enough, and who has made no noise about knowing any “secrets,” let alone threatening to write about them, is the key to unraveling the great Brangelina mysteries of our time.

That’s what Star wants us to believe.

And the tabloid doesn’t even pretend to know what Charlotiaux might theoretically “know,” instead just mentions a bunch of unrelated rumors about the couple (a supposed October 2008 fight over Inglorious Basterds co-star Diane Kruger, Pitt’s supposedly “close relationship” with ex Jennifer Aniston, etc.), and setting up Charlotiaux as a kind of omnipresent eyewitness.

If she doesn’t receive “fair compensation,” suggests a Star “source,” Charlotiaux “will be sitting on a bombshell book about her life with the Brangie brood.”

No, she won’t.

This is utter nonsense.

A source close to Pitt and Jolie said that while they’re not commenting on the ongoing legal situation, Star‘s premise – that Charlotiaux has a bunch of Brangelina secrets to spill – is absurd.

Check out PHOTOS of Brad & Angie at the Moneyball premiere in Japan!

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